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Friday, March 20, 2009
Israeli Prime Minister-designate Benjamin 'Bibi' Netanyahu has been given another two weeks to find some more top level fruitcakes to include in his governing coalition.
President Shimon Peres is said to be dissatisfied at the level of insanity within the proposed cabinet as it currently stands, and has ordered Bibi to dig out some more Arab-hating nutjobs to round off the ministerial team.
So far, the foreign minister post is set to go to Avigdor Lieberman, the leader of Yisrael Beitenu, a party that advocates making all non-Jewish Israeli's wear green stars as they are kicked out of the country. Other posts are set to go to a swathe of other right-wing and special interest parties including Shas, United Torah Judaism, National Union, and the brand new Kick Some Sand in That Arab Boy's Soup party.
Despite efforts to bring the Labour Party into the coalition, it is thought that they are not quite certifiable enough to be given government jobs at this time. Ehud Barak, the party chairman and a former PM, was seen walking in a straight line and talking coherently yesterday, effectively ruling himself out of a Cabinet seat.
Netanyahu is nevertheless convinced that he can find enough lunatics to fill his government. He was seen going into the Sha'ar Mensahe psychiatric hospitalto inspect potential candidates for the position of national security minister. A crazed 76 year old man known as Tommy, who refuses to wear clothes and believes he is a dolphin, is understood to be the frontrunner for the post.