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Wednesday, December 3, 2008

Queen to open parliament to buyers

As the British economy teeters on the brink of bankruptcy, the government has come up with an innovative way to raise some hard cash.

Prime Minister Gordon Brown has decided to cancel the traditional state opening of parliament today and instead is selling the Palace of Westminster.

The Queen will be in attendance at the historic building from midday with the usual pomp and pageantry accompanying tours for prospective buyers. The palace will be for sale in separate sections to maximize revenue, with the plush interior of the House of Lords and the sweeping views from Big Ben expected to generate the most interest.

A succession of middle eastern princes, Texan oil billionaires, and footballers with more money than sense will be shown through the opulent corridors and rooms by Queen Elizabeth and other royals with price tags in the billions demanded for a chunk of the building.

Chancellor Alistair Darling defended the sale and denied that it is an assault of British history and democracy. "Parts of this building might date back almost a thousand years, but that's how long it will take us to pay off the national overdraft if we don't get some money fast."

1 comment:

  1. Just as an aside - the building is bloody marvellous. It's used as a sucker punch. Similar to York Minster - art man, art and space.

    Today has been brilliant buddy - unbelievably ridiculously brilliant. I kinda feel that teenagers are gonna be picking up exactly the wrong messages but..


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