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Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Obama arrives in London - protestors melt away


In scenes reminiscent of a famous
Only Fools and Horses episode, President Obama has been allowed through crowds of angry G20 demonstrators on his way to breakfast with Gordon Brown.

Like Delboy, the president arrived in the middle of a riot scene outside Downing Street and honked his horn in an attempt to get through. When the mob realised who it was, one shouted "HANG ON, IT'S BARACK!" and the crowd immediately parted long enough for his car to get through.

One anti-globalisation protestor wearing Nike trainers explained why the new President was let off the hook. "He's different to all the other world leaders, he understands us," she said checking her Apple iPhone for the latest instructions. "He won't put American trade and jobs ahead of poverty reduction and environmental standards."

Further east outside the Excel centre in London's Docklands, angry protestors were cheered by the prospect of seeing Obama in the flesh for the first time.

"Hey, he's really cool and not anything like a world leader who could change the global system overnight by signing a piece of paper but doesn't," said 26 year old Sebastian Smith, drinking from a non-recyclable cup of non-fairtrade Cafe Nero coffee.

"He is just like us - except he'll be arriving in an armoured limousine and has a team of CIA goons to protect him."

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