Susan Boyle thing 'getting really silly'

.We're all doomed, but at least Britain's Got Talent

With the news that film star Demi Moore is to fly in from the US to support Susan Boyle in the final of Britain's Got Talent, the world has accepted that things are getting out of hand.

In the week that North Korea pushed the world to the brink of nuclear war, the Taleban pushed Pakistan to the brink of anarchy, and more Tory MPs pushed some peasants out of the way to get to the trough, many are concerned that mindless TV is getting too much attention.

According to reports, former South African President and Nobel Laureate Nelson Mandela tried to get a spot on the show to publicise his AIDS foundation but was refused due to his lack of a Twitter account.

Boyle, who now lives in a mansion surrounded by armed guards, was unavailable for comment as her publicist was snorting a large line of coke off her arse when we called.